StRaNgE tHiNgS aNd A hAtE oF mArY-sUeS!
by LARRISSA-HAYLIE IS MI
Summary: Strange things are happening in Middle-Earth! The people of Middle-Earth are not sure whether to be worried or not! A bright purple and pink book, two fairies (one called Toast!), a wish and the craziest Mary-Sue ever! note-to-self: this is why you don't leave fan-fiction around!
1. Chapter 1

**Welcome reader to my new story. This is a story making fun of Mary-Sues so if you hate them please read! I can't promise that I will update regularly but I will try! Thanks to My Friend Eiake (EvilFaerieQueen on tumblr) for her help! (Betas and so)**

**Everything you recognise if not mine, everything you don't recognise is mine!**

Prologue

Niagara-Rose Magenta-SilverSparkleson hated her life. It was so hard, so stressful. Her English teacher didn't recognise her obvious brilliance. Her music teacher had completely missed her wonderful voice and ear for tune. Her drama teacher had blanked her empathy and skill. She was piled homework every night. She was teased for 'being ugly' she wasn't ugly! She was the prettiest most beautiful person who ever lived and one day she decided to show it…

Adelynia stopped writing. Her story was a parallel tale to her own life. They had to write a 'tragic' story for English. Adelynia had decided on her own life, of course, but she had decided that it was too tragic so she invented Niagara to fill that gap. How Adelynia wished her life were nicer!

'SPRINKLE!'

A fairy stood in the middle of the room!

"I have taken pity on you Adelyn Clarkson! I will teleport you into the Lord Of The Rings universe, Middle Earth!"

"What? Omgz that sounds totes amaze!" Adelynia squealed "but pls gurl don't call me Adelyn! Its such as yucky name!"

The fairy raised an eyebrow "but Adelyn is your name…"

"Uhuh but it's so drab and doesn't suit my sooo obvi like talents! Besides how can I get all those hawt guys to notice me if my me is Adelyn-its sooo cringe! Pls fairy gurl can ya change my name?"

"Hmmmm. I suppose"

"Yeay!" Adelynia (or Adelyn) squealed "I want my name to be totes perfect and suit me down to da smexy toe!"

'TOASTLE!'

Another fairy appeared!

"Oi! Niagara-Rose Magenta-SilverSparkleson! Adelyn Clarkson! Adelynia! I am the fairy of names! If you want a name you ask me!"

"Toast!" the other fairy complained, "this was my Mary-Sue mission!"

"And Sprinksey?" 'Toast' asked, "this is my job!"

'Sprinksey' frowned before her face cleared "we can both decide on her name!"

Toast looked from Adelyn/Adelynia/Niagara-Rose to Sprinksey. "Fine!"

"Must be totes smexy!" Adelynia reminded "and must be kinda mysterious but not to much. Must make me look totes sweet and sound so clever but not a nerdy name! Kay?"

"Hmmmm. How about Amethyst-AdelyniaRose McSilvergoldson?"

"Perfect!"

And thus Amethyst-AdelyniaRose McSilvergoldson appeared on a name badge pinned to Adelyn-sorry Amethyst's chest

"Now" Sprinksey said "we need to make a few minor adjustments to you!"

"What da ya mean? Im totes perfect like I am!" Amethyst complained

"Well you would like a bigger chest wouldn't you?" Sprinksey said. Amethyst nodded eagerly. "And longer hair and wider hips and the most tragic back story ever!"

"Duh!" Amethyst squealed.

"Well then" Sprinksey waved her wand. Amethyst stood there, the most radiant beauty you had ever seen! She had long, long, luscious chocolate brown hair with purple ends that reached her butt (which was just the right size and shape!) and the biggest, poutiest lips ever! Her nose was tiny and adorable and tipped ever so slightly at the end. She had large, deer shaped goldy-purple eyes with piles of expertise eyeliner! She was taller and much, much curvier with an hourglass waist. Her legs were long, and curved like a dancers and she had some of the smallest, daintiest feet ever! She had long goldy-purple nails to match her eyes and a purple pendant hung around her neck!

"Amethyst-AdelyniaRose McSilvergoldson I grant you the title of Mary-Sue!" Sprinksey said grandly

"Here is your quest to Middle-Earth! Toast and me will not be able to record your story any longer so you just keep a track of it! Go smexy girl and win Middle-Earth"

And with a flash of sprinkles and glitter and toast crumbs, Amethyst-AdelyniaRose McSilvergoldson was gone!


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2 is here! I must admit its kind of fun writing like a MarySue! Please review, Kudos, Follow whatever. With thanks to Eiake , EvilFaerieQueen on tumblr!**

* * *

Hiya peeps! I'm Amethyst-AdelyniaRose McSilvergoldson. I am like the bestest and most prettieh peple in da whwl of da earfh! Omg! Im just sooo perfect it impoble to get any beter! Wooh! Cos I jst rock like that babe!11111!

Anyway there are sum fings you gotta no about me befor I strt the storie of my sooooooo tragcc lif! Kay gurl? Fistly I am da most prettieh and perfect in da whowle worldddddddd!11111!1111 secondz I lurve all da smexy elfs and stuff in lord of da ringz and thirdzly I am a millioon timez beter den u and u can nevr nevr beet me!

My stOri strts cos I was in rivnell and-

-THIS IS EIAKE! SHE IS THE QUEEN FAIRY! SHE ORDERS SPRINKSEY AND TOAST TO SPELL AND GRAMMER CHECK THE SUES STORY PROPERLY OR FEEL HER WRAITH!-

Toast: "what! I HATE English! This is your entire fault Sprinks!

Sprinksey: Explain how?

Toast: its your MarySue!

Sprinksey: and? _you_ helped me make her!

Toast: still your fault!

Sprinksey: not its not!

Toast: yes it is!

Sprinksey: no it-

Glitter: Shut Up! Just fix it all right! Eiake is not called the EVIL faerie queen for nothing!

Toast: fine then!

Sprinksey: ok…

Glitter: hopefully Amethyst's account of the story might be readable now…. how ever I am not sure that Toast's English is any better!

My story starts when I was on the run. These horrid men where trying to grab me because I am so prettieh and sch and I couldn't fight them because I broke a nail! so I was wlkin sooo fast but I hd ben shot but they mssd but my foot hert so-

Glitter: OI! You two need to translate this to English!

Toast: I AM!

Glitter: **sighs** – Sprinksey take over. You can keep bits like omgz and such just don't have all thoses shorten words!

Toast: not my fault Eiake can't read them!

Glitter: no one can apart from you and the insane Mary-sues who write them!

Toast: grrrrrrr

Sprinksey: I tell you what readers. I will translate this to readable stuff but keep the mary sue things. We will not interrupt the story again-

Toast: I will!

Sprinksey:-go away toast!- as I was saying we will not interrupt this again and apologises for all the above. I think Glitter just wanted to make it look longer!

Lets start again-

I waz running realy fast cos I'm just beautiful like that and cos all these nasty mens were trying to feel me up and they r far 2 ugly 4 me!11 so I waz running and suddenly I stopped cos there was this thing in front of me and it waz sooo amax cos it waz Riverdelle! It waz almost as prettieh as me but it will be better if I gett it purple! Cos I am Amethyst gurl and purple is my BFF! Anywayz as I waz saying these men were sooo ugly and were chasing me cos I am sooo BEAUTIFUL and then this super hawt elf just sparng up and shott the men! Wow! This elf then tured 2 look at me annd he was sooo cute! He had long brown hair and green eyes and was really fit!11!11 then he bowed to me and said "I am so sorry my beautiful lady for disrupting you but it seemed you were in trouble, Do you require any more assistance my elf-lady?"

"Sorry but I am not an elf" I said really cutely

"What?" he asked, "forgive me then but what are you? You are far to beautiful to be anything mortal"

"I am just a human" I had a tinkling laugh that sounds like a bell or sumthing even better

"Well you are the most beautiful mortal I have ever seen!" the elf exclaimed, "May I have your name?"

"I am Amethyst-AdelyniaRose McSilvergoldson. You may call me what ever you like!"

He blushed a bit at this "may I call you Adelynia please? It is a name beyond compare!"

I smiled "of course, thank you" then I decided to blush a little to make it more romantic. Then I pushed my chest out a little and tucked a piece of hair behind my smexy head.

"Well Fair-maiden AdelyniaRose may I be any help you?"

"Sure" I said seductively "those men ripped my dress and I really can't wear it like this. Please help me out of it"

his eyes widened and he nodded and then he unlaced the back and I guided his hands round over by breasts and began to kiss my hair while leant back. Then I turned to face him and he pulled my dress over my head and I unbuttoned his tunic and soon we were naked and he was sooo Hawt! And then –

THE FOLLOWING CONTENT IS INAPPROPRIATE FOR READING. I GUESS YOU HAVE A CLEAR IDEA OF WHAT IT IS.


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